Cyberbullying Has Serious Consequences

QUESTION:

My teenage son told me he has a friend who is being cyberbullied. I don’t know much about this and was wondering if you had any information on what cyberbullying is and how to prevent it?

ANSWER:

Cyberbullying is just what it sounds like, bullying through Internet applications and technologies such as instant messaging (IM), social networking sites, and cell phones. It can start easily, with a rumor, a photo or a forwarded message and just as easily spiral out of control. Cyberbullying victims may be targeted anywhere, at any time. The  would like to provide the following information on cyberbullying from the National Crime Prevention Council at www.ncpc.org/topics/cyberbullying and Netsmartz at www.netsmartz.org/Cyberbullying.

 Some common forms of cyberbullying include:

• Flaming and Trolling: Sending or posting hostile messages intended to “inflame” the emotions of others
• Happy-Slapping: Recording someone being harassed or bullied in a way that usually involves physical abuse, then posting the video online for public viewing
• Identity Theft/Impersonation: Stealing someone’s password and/or hijacking their online accounts to send or post incriminating or humiliating pictures, videos, or information
• Photoshopping: Doctoring digital images so that the main subject is placed in a compromising or embarrassing situation
• Physical Threats: Sending messages that involve threats to a person’s physical safety
• Rumor Spreading: Spreading gossip through e-mail, text messaging, or social networking sites

Contrary to what cyberbullies may believe cyberbullying is a big deal and can cause a variety of reactions in teens. Some teens have reacted in positive ways to try to prevent cyberbullying by:

• Blocking communication with the cyberbully.
• Deleting messages without reading them.
• Talking to a friend about the bullying.
• Reporting the problem to an Internet service provider or website moderator.

Some teens feel threatened because they may not know who is cyberbullying them. Although cyberbullies may think they are anonymous, they can be found. If you or someone you know is cyberbullied or harassed and needs help, save all communication with the cyberbully and talk to a parent, teacher, police officer or other adult you trust.

What teens need to know:

• Refuse to pass along cyberbullying messages.
• Tell friends to stop cyberbullying.
• Block communication with cyberbullies.
• Never give out personal information online whether in blogs, texts, Facebook, etc.
• Never tell anyone but your parents your password. Don't even tell friends.
• If someone sends a mean or threatening message, don't respond. Save it or print it out and show it to an adult.
• Never open emails from someone you don't know or from someone you know is a bully.
• Don't put anything online that you wouldn't want your classmates to see, even in email or text messages.
• Don't send messages when you're angry. Before clicking "send," ask yourself how you would feel if you received the message.
• Help kids who are bullied online by not joining in.
• Always be as polite online as you are in person.

Parents can help stop cyberbullying:

Since most cyberbullying takes place at home, it's important that parents know about cyberbullying and that they get involved in preventing it.  Just like parents help their kids avoid inappropriate websites, they can protect them from cyberbullying.

Parents can start by talking to kids about the issue and teaching them the rules below that will help prevent cyberbullying from happening to them or someone they know.

• Keep your home computer in a busy area of your house.
• Set up email and social web site accounts with your children. Make sure that you know their screen names and passwords and that they don't include any personal information in their online profiles.
• Regularly go over their instant messenger "buddy list" or Facebook “friends” with them. Ask who each person is and how your children know him or her.
• Discuss cyberbullying with your children and ask if they have ever experienced it or seen it happen to someone else
• Tell your children that you won't blame them if they are cyberbullied. Emphasize that you won't take away their computer privileges: This is the main reason kids don't tell adults when they are cyberbullied.

Anyone with questions for the Chief’s Column may submit them by mail to the Grafton Police Department, 28 Providence Road, Grafton, MA 01519.  You may also email your questions or comments to chief@graftonpolice.com.  Please include an appropriate subject line, as I do not open suspicious email for obvious reasons. 

Normand A. Crepeau, Jr. is Grafton's Chief of Police.