Five Ways to Avoid a Valentine's Day Massacre

Editor's Note: With Valentine's Day upon us, three Lehigh Valley Patch Local Editors wrote columns about how to properly celebrate the day. Each had a different, but entertaining perspective. Here's the first, written by a married man who hopes not to be sleeping on the sofa tomorrow night.

Valentine’s Day looms large – it’s coming up on Monday – and it’s a tough one for us guys to get right. Neglecting to put proper thought into gift-giving can turn the biggest romantic holiday of the year into a real Valentine's Day massacre.

So, as a public service, we've put together a list of five things you can do to make the female in your life happy on Feb. 14. 

1.  A former co-worker of mine actually purchased his wife the “Buns of Steel,” workout video one memorable Valentine’s Day about 15 years ago. She'd told him of her desire to start working out. He spent several nights on the sofa as a result. Don't repeat that infamous mistake. Instead, purchase a gift card for , and you'll be hailed a hero.

2. Don't buy her a Food Network cookbook. She'll think you want her slaving away in the kitchen or get the impression her cooking is sub-par. Avoid this pratfall by grabbing a  gift card. If she buys a Rachael Ray book, all the better for you, right?

3. Your sweetie has a sweet tooth, but is adamant about cutting calories. Bring home a basket of healthy, fruity goodness from 

4. Time away from you and the family will probably do your better half a world of good. Give her a certificate to , where she can receive her choice of manicures, pedicures and massages.

5. Finally, if you're going to follow the traditional route, don't stop at the local gas station at 5 p.m. and buy small roses in plastic wrap. T can take care of all of your needs. I would suggest ordering in advance.