Man Kicked Out of Bar After Telling Murder Joke

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: Man walks into a bar, tells a joke, then gets kicked out.

On March 25, a patron was asked to leave for doing just that.

Martin Mullen, 54, of Philadelphia, was sitting at the establishment on Pine Road talking with another customer sitting next to him last Sunday night. According to the report, Mullen passed a handwritten note on a napkin to the man sitting next to him. The note read (without punctuation):

“Me and a guy were up for murder and attempted murder after lunch I knew the kitchen workers and I asked a favor my case was after lunch I took my favor and when the judge said how do you plead I said guilty your honor reached in my pants and pulled out two scoops of peanut butter and licked my fingers dry.”

Mullen said that he was just trying to make a joke and that the quote was from a movie. Mullen also said that he’s never been arrested for murder, or attempted murder.

Mullen also told police that he suffers from throat cancer and when he speaks, he often has to whisper because people have a hard time understanding him. He passed the note on a napkin because it was difficult to speak.

The bartender who called police said she was concerned because it was just her and another female bartender working that night and didn’t realize the man wasn't serious. Mullen was asked to leave for the night when police arrived, but is allowed to return in the future.

Mullen, who had consumed a couple of beers prior to the police arriving, walked home according to the report. Mullen returned to Oh! Bryon’s later that night to pick up his car, but it wasn’t in the parking lot. Police were still on scene when Mullen returned and advised him that he is not permitted on the property that night and would be charged with trespassing.