Centenarian Finds Simple Pleasures Most Memorable

After a century of living, Faye Bernstein will tell you it’s the simple pleasures that matter most. Joined by family from around the country for her 100^th birthday celebration, She beamed while being read the president’s centurion greeting. She savored each bite of her chocolate birthday cake. When asked to share one of her fondest memories, it took no time for her reply–birthday 15 when she received her first pair of roller skates. 

Faye’s attachment to simple pleasures might be because her life wasn’t so simple.

Born February 9, 1912 in Brooklyn, New York, Faye Freeman was the youngest and only daughter born to Russian Jewish immigrants. She was very close to her five older brothers. “They protected me,” she said, and taught her to swim which she continued to enjoy into her 90s. “I’ve always loved the freedom of movement in water and being completely alone in my own world.”

Just about the time Faye got her roller skates, she also met 19-year-old Harry Bernstein who was to become her husband. “His appearance—the way he dressed—made me go for him right away,” she said.  

They married four years later during the depression, both working to make ends meet. Harry was a haberdasher for the garment industry, and Faye worked in a clerical position. When WWII broke out, although he was in his late 30s, Harry enlisted in the Navy and became a Seabee. He was stationed in Hawaii, and Faye moved to Los Angeles to be closer to him and other family members who had moved west.

After the war, the couple settled in Gardena then moved to Bellflower when Harry became manager of the men’s department for the local May Company department store. Faye was a homemaker raising their three boys–Steven, Gary, and Richard.

For eight years all was just like any post-war American family until the day Harry suffered a fatal heart attack at age 44. Their eldest son, Steven, was eight at the time. “There was no life insurance. Dad had just bought a new car but my mom didn’t know how to drive,” he said.

Overnight, Faye’s life changed. She became both provider and caregiver, returning to clerical work while learning to drive. She eventually landed a job at the Department of Motor Vehicles. At night she was busy attending the boys’ school football games and performances. In an era when single parents were uncommon, the boys knew at times it became overwhelming for her. “We would find Mom and my grandfather crying in the kitchen together,” said Gary, recalling those days long ago.  

Faye did not let her husband’s death deter her from their goal of sending the first generation in their family to college. Steve and Gary attended on football scholarships. “My mom always fought for us,” said Richard, her youngest. “If we were a point away from being on the dean’s honor list, she negotiated a retake of a class in summer school to get a higher grade.”

Only five at the time of his father’s death, Richard sends his mother a Mother’s Day and a Father’s Day card every year.

At age 65, Faye retired from the DMV. It didn’t matter that she couldn’t afford travel or extravagances during her golden years. She enjoyed walking miles around her neighborhood until she was 98. Her escape was a good book or swim at the YWCA. When she felt like an indulgence, she took her two grandkids to the drugstore “to pick out something your parents won’t let you have,” said granddaughter Malinda Young.

Faye also loved her garden, meeting friends for lunch, and spending time with her extended family, which now includes a great grandson.

A lifetime of healthy eating and exercise no doubt attributed to Faye being able to live on her own until she was 92. Her family felt it was time that she had help with meals and housekeeping. She continued to enjoy her walks and routine from an assisted living community.

A year ago when she began to have memory challenges, she moved to Agoura Hills Senior Retreat’s Special Care Unit. “She’s being well taken care of,” said Gary, a resident of Agoura Hills. “As long as I can remember she ended every call to all of us with, ‘take care of yourself and take care of each other’.”

-- Judi Uthus, special to Agoura Hills Patch