Standing on Shaky Ground

I have this terrible habit of rocking to the outsides of my feet when I’m nervous, causing my ankles to feel like I’m on unstable ground even when I’m not.

Several pairs of my shoes are worn on the outer edges for this reason.

A college roommate once told me that she loved math because it was always the same, always perfect, always stable.

Personally, I find it to be the most unstable force in the world. My answers are not consistent, not stable in the least.

For me, words are stable. I know I can convey exactly what I want you to know through my words.

Grammar is stable. The words mean the same things over and over again.

Ballet is stable. The way I know where my feet will be when I land a jump is consistent. I know the way my toes will feel when I reach the ground. I know what to do in the apex of a jump.

My family is stable. I know a call to my daddy will certainly end with the phrase, “you’re ten feet tall and bulletproof.”

I know my momma will try to fix any problem with shopping. (Hey, it works for us.)

I know my boy cousins will come beat up anyone I need them to beat up. Every time. No exceptions.

So when things like math come crashing into my little world, I retreat to the things I know to be true. When the GMAT barrels into my schedule and threatens to upset my routine, I go back to the facts and figures I can understand.

It’s good to be rocked a little. It’s good to make your ankles wobbly even when they don’t have to be. The important part is knowing what your firm ground is and knowing you can return to it in a moment’s notice.

After all, how else will you know what you can’t do unless you try it at least once?

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