Drunkest 'Designated Driver' Ever Arrested: Patch PM

Stories worth talking about tonight:

Drunken 'Designated Driver' Said He Was the 'Most Sober': Police

Things not to do when you're the "designated driver." Don't get drunk. Don't try to flee the police. Don't drive onto the sidewalk. Don't tell cops you're the "most sober." Don't kick and scream in the squad car. Don't call your arresting officer an "idiot." Don't vomit in the officer's trash can. But if you do any or all of those things, by all means make a silly face for your booking mug and also say something worth quoting in a police report. "This is going to be a memorable night for you," for example, makes the night memorable for everyone.

Sinead O'Connor Found After Friend Reports Her Missing in Wilmette

The singer was last seen Sunday afternoon in Wilmette after she went on a bike ride. Police were called and issued an alert with a description as they tried to find her. TMZ reported she might be a risk to herself. with: Celebs, Sinead O'Connor Fans Go Online to Support Missing Singer

St. Charles Teen Dies After Falling Off Vehicle in Marmion Academy Parking Lot

The driver of the vehicle, a North Aurora teen, has been cited for reckless driving.

Girl, 12, Missing From West Englewood

Raziyah Hammond was last seen near 70th and Claremont nearly two weeks ago.

Wheaton College Grad Suspected in Fatal Stabbing of Pregnant Wife

Police suspect Yeveginy Saveok, 30, murdered his wife, Lyuba.

Listeria Hysteria: The Bug That Won't Go Away

IN PATCH WEEKLY: a digest of features and perspective for Illinois Patch fans

Plus:

FitBits, Hiking Boots, WiFi Extender: Monday's Best Patch Deals

Also Worth a Look Today

• Judge's Son Pleads Guilty to Kicking Around and Locking Girlfriend in Trunk, Gets to Walk Free
• Cops Raid House Looking For Gun, Find 3 Kids Living Unattended in Filth: Police
• 3rd Suspect Arrested Downstate in Murder of 9-Year-Old Tyshawn Lee: Reports
• O'Hare Nightmare: Long TSA Lines Lead to Overnight Stays for Travelers
• Cop-Shooting Fugitive Dies in Gun Battle with State Police and FBI
• Should Former COD President Robert Breuder Receive Unemployment Benefits?

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