This post is sponsored and contributed by Victorian Village Health and Wellness Center, a Patch Brand Partner.

Community Corner

Are Mom & Dad Okay?

What to Look for When You Visit Family

(Victorian Village Health & Wellness Center)

This is a paid post contributed by a Patch Community Partner. The views expressed in this post are the author's own, and the information presented has not been verified by Patch.


It’s the holiday season, which means many of us will have the opportunity to spend extra time with family. It’s a wonderful time of festive meals and warm conversation, but sometimes these visits uncover some unpleasant issues, and you and your family may ask yourselves, “Are Mom and Dad okay? Are they still safe living alone?”

If you’re visiting elderly family over the holidays, here are some things to take note of:

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1. Look in the fridge and cupboards. Are there expired products? Do they have enough food, representing a well-balanced diet? Some of this is personal choice, but it could also mean your parents aren’t able to go grocery shopping regularly, can’t read the expiration dates (which are often in small or light print), or that they simply forget about eating. This is especially important if they appear to have lost a great deal of weight, or if they have bouts of stomach illness, which could be food poisoning.

2. Their personal hygiene is declining. What you’re looking for is a change from what is typical for your parents. Does it appear that they haven’t bathed, shaved, or changed their clothes in a while? If this seems to have changed, it may be because it has become too difficult for them to bathe themselves, or it could even mean they have forgotten to do so. Unfortunately, it may also be a sign of depression, an ailment that is on the rise in older adults.

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3. Their home is unclean. Again, think about the “level-of-clean” their house has generally been at—is it in decline now? Chores become much more difficult as we age, and they may be unable to keep up, especially if they live in a large home with multiple stories.

4. Check their medication. Look at the date the prescription was issued. Does it seem like they should have less (or more) in their pill bottles? Are they forgetting to take their medication altogether, or are they accidentally double-dosing themselves because they forgot they already took the medicine?

This is a touchy area, and it should be approached with compassion and kindness. Your parents’ rights should be respected, and they may not want you looking at their meds or rummaging through their cabinets. But if they are open to a conversation, there are a few things you can do.

First, talk with your parents and see if they would be open to some help around the house from family or an outside agency. Sometimes just a few hours a week can make all the difference. Maybe you and other family members can discuss a schedule to ensure your parents have the help they need at home.

Secondly, explore the idea of a senior living community. At Victorian Village, whether a resident opts for Independent Living or Assisted Living, they will have three chef-inspired meals each day, housekeeping, and healthcare staff available 24/7, should the need arise. They will also have life-enriching social opportunities that combat the isolation many seniors feel when living at home, leading to depression. Our specialized fitness program helps our residents maximize their movement and physical health, allowing them to be independent longer.

Another option is living with your parents—either they move into your home, or you into theirs. While many people may not have the space or freedom for this option, it is a great way for your parents to have some privacy, but also have family available if needed. Some people opt to move to a new home with an “in-law suite” option—a separate set of rooms that will give both sides of the family their own living areas.

If you aren’t sure if your parents need help, contact the senior experts at Victorian Village at VV@provlife.com or (708) 301-0800. We’d be happy to help you think through the situation. You can also see senior living options available at Victorian Village at www.VictorianVillage.com.


This post is an advertorial piece contributed by a Patch Community Partner, a local brand partner. To learn more, click here

This post is sponsored and contributed by Victorian Village Health and Wellness Center, a Patch Brand Partner.