What Will Be Done Faster? White Sox Rebuild or 159th Construction?

Oak Forest residents have been buzzing over a hot local debate: which project will actually finish first—the Chicago White Sox rebuild or the ongoing construction nightmare on 159th Street?

Local resident Mike Rzab shook his head. “I’ve already seen three generations of traffic cones out here. Some of them have kids now. At this point, I think the Sox will win a World Series before I can make a left turn.”

Tina Hubert wasn’t as optimistic. “Let’s be real,” she said. “The Sox can’t hit, and IDOT can’t pour concrete on time. I’m starting to pack snacks just to get from Cicero to Harlem.”

Meanwhile, Stan Gibson offered a solution: “Merge the two projects. Let the Sox rebuild on 159th. At least then we’d get to watch a game while we sit in traffic.”

For now, Oak Forest residents are left waiting—either for a pennant or for the orange cones to disappear. Whichever comes first may just be the biggest upset of the year.