"I'm Sad This Couldn't Happen Earlier"

As a gay man, Roseville's Gary Grefenberg has had plenty of reason to closely follow state legislation that would legalize marriage for same-sex couples in Minnesota.

Today (Wednesday), the state House of Representatives took "a critical first,"  Grefenberg said, in passing a bill on that subject by a 75-59 vote. The Minnesota Senate is now expected to take up that same-sex marriage issue early next week and if it passes the bill, it would go to Gov. Mark Dayton to be signed into law. 

"I hope it (the same-sex marriage bill) passes," said Grefenberg, also the chairman of the Roseville Human Rights Commission. But he said, with some lament, "For me, I'm sad it couldn't have happened earlier."

Grefenberg also contended that for too many years,  society has treated gay people as "second-class citizens."

Grefenberg said he first admitted to himself in 1971 that he was gay; then it took himself three years to share that fact with his parents. 

Later, Grefenberg became active in the Minnesota Committee for Gay and Lesbian Rights, lobbied the Legislature to extend the Minnesota Human Rights Act to also cover gay, lesbian and transgender people. State lawmakers took that action in 1993, 20 years ago, Grefenberg said. 

Now with Minnesota probably on the verge of becoming the 12th state in the nation to legalize same-sex marriage, Grefenberg said the bill is a symbol of eliminating discrimination against gay people. In his case, Grefenberg said he has had a faithful relationship with the same man for 37 years. 

"We are like any other couple," Grefenberg said. It would be good if same-sex couples had the same recognition and benefits as married heterosexual couples, he contended. 

Last year, Grefenberg opposed a proposed Minnesota constitutional amendment that would have legally defined marriage as between one man and woman,  He shared his thoughts on the subject in a Roseville Patch article. 

Grefenberg led the Human Rights Commission last year in passing a resolution that opposed the Marriage Amendment, then urged the City Council to take the same action. The Çouncil did so unanimously after hearing divided testimony from residents at a public hearing last summer. 

During the the city's consideration of the Marriage Amendment, Grefenberg said that one resident accused him of pushing his own personal agenda. But Grefenberg disagreed with the criticism/

"I think my being gay is an asset," Grefenberg said. "It can give me some insight on what prejudice does."