'I've Spent Weeks Just Crying'; Doylestown Couple Raising Funds After Husband's Paralysis

DOYLESTOWN, PA — After a Doylestown man spent months in the hospital enduring four different infections that would eventually paralyze him from the waist down, with his wife working as much as she could to keep their health benefits, they got the bill: a nearly $10,000 copay for the power wheelchair he needed to be mobile.

And that was just the start.

Jane Sebesky said just one modification to allow wheelchair access over the lip of their shower will cost around $17,000. Plus, it's become increasingly clear that she'll need to purchase a wheelchair-accessible vehicle — $20,000, at the absolute cheapest. And her husband, Kevin, will likely need in-home care so that she can keep working.

"I’m a physical therapist, so you’d think that I would know [the cost of] all this, but clearly I had no idea," Jane told Patch in a phone interview. "I just was flabbergasted."

Kevin is a former web designer, but has been unable to work recently after having 17 spinal surgeries in seven years and a stint in the hospital that lasted from September to December of 2021. (He was discharged from rehabilitation just before Christmas, saying being back in his space with Jane and their dogs was "the ultimate gift").

The pair's adult children, who help Kevin out two days a week and allow Jane to work, came up with the idea to start a fundraiser on GoFundMe.

The family's first ask in mid-January was $15,000 — and they received nearly double that in donations.

"I’ve spent weeks just crying over it because people are so generous," Jane said. "We’ve lived here a long time and we’ve helped a lot of people, but I just didn’t realize how many people were on our side."

But they've also quickly learned that the necessary home modifications and the time Jane needs off of work mean that the overall bill will be much higher. Last week, Jane increased the request to $100,000.

This is a new normal for the pair, who have been together since they were 16 and lived in Doylestown for more than 30 years.

But between donations to the GoFundMe, their neighbors taking care of the family labradoodles while Kevin was in the hospital, and a retired engineer friend building them temporary home modifications, the past months have made career caregiver Jane realize how necessary help can be.

"People say, you should move," she said tearfully. "You should sell your house, you should downsize, you should move onto one floor — but I wouldn’t have made it through any of this without my neighbors. And the thought of not having that support is just not an option."

Kevin agreed, saying, "They've saved us."

He said he was shocked when funds started flowing in. At first, he didn't recognize many names: but on the list were former kids he'd coached in a Warwick baseball league, friends of his children, and more community members, many giving "the most incredible donations."

"I wish I could thank everyone personally," he said, "And I intend to."

Their friend, Martha Marchesi, shared the pair's story with Patch after the initial round of donations, hoping to gain more visibility.

"They are such wonderful people!" she wrote.

On Tuesday, the Sebeskys were $70,087 away from their goal.

In terms of the day-to-day, Kevin described the past few months as "uphill," learning new skills in physical and occupational therapy to function as a T6 paraplegic.

He said recently, he and his wife worked to coordinate his movements and supports and he was able to stand for a moment.

"I stood up and it was this major [thing]," he said. "We both just started crying. I said 'It’s not much, it’s just standing up,' and she said, 'Yeah, but that’s where it begins.' If I’m ever to have a way out of this, this is the type of thing that I need to be mindful of."

Their 37-year marriage has been a support all its own.

"I’m so blessed to have her — not just because she’s a physical therapist — but because I just love her," Kevin said.

Despite the amount the family has been through, both remain effusive about their gratitude for their community.

"I don’t want to sound like my story is so sad," Kevin said. "It’s not a happy story, but there are certainly positive elements. You can see the silver lining in everything if you try, and knowing that there are that many people out there that love you or that are willing to donate to help you — that’s a silver lining right there."

Those who wish to donate to the Sebesky family's GoFundMe can do so here.

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