Bizarre Press Release of the Day

Some press releases are more elegantly written than others. Some require further clarification. And then there are those that are just bizarre—like this missive I received today from a man eager to share his triumph over 'bird discomforts.'

What are 'bird discomforts'? That's what I wondered. Had my correspondent had a traumatic experience with birds as a child, leading to nightmares every time he saw a pigeon in the park?

Whatever they were, they were 'not esthetics,' according to the release.

Because I—like most journalists—am cursed with an insatiable curiosity, I was soon combing the web for this man's company. My search led to a website for a product called Shock Tape (not made in Elk Grove), graced by a picture of a cheerful-looking bird holding a roll of tape. Apparently, the clear tape is for applying to roofs and window ledges, where it transmits a small electric shock to any bird unlucky enough to land on it.

In a miracle of Pavlovian psychology, the birds soon learn to leave the building in question alone.

"All neighborhood birds agree the tape is to be avoided," the website reads.

Is this humane? Is it necessary? I'm not sure. But I am appending the full release below for your reading enjoyment. And if you, too, suffer from bird discomforts, you now know where to turn.

Dear Sir/ Madam.

After years of suffering from birds discomforts and looking for solutions I became frustrated.

None of the regular systems really worked nor handled the problem.

And worse than that it was "not esthetics" to say the least.

Did you ever encounter similar problem?

All my problems were solved once I have found Shock Tape, and I thought you might find interest in it as well.

Shock Tape is a revolutionary method in bird repellent and is forwarding all pest control business to the 21th century.

With Shock Tape you will get:

• Solution to endless types of birds' based problems

• High profits for you

• Employees' costs saving

• Easy and fast installation ("plug and play")

• Opens your business for more markets and potential clients

• As the ONLY REAL solution for birds' repellent – you could enjoy from many referrals from your customers – perfect word of mouth product

• Unfair advantage over your competitors

For real working solution and higher profits for you - send now your full name in replied e-mail.

Sincerely yours

RON SADOT, CEO

SHOCK-TAPE

Sole Global Distributor