'Any Parent Would Do This': Dad Donates Kidney To Daughter

NEW LENOX, IL — Emme Ward, of Manhattan, is a young woman just starting to make her way in the world. Her father, Bob Ward, of New Lenox, has found his path in the world as a coach for several teams at Lincoln-Way Central High School. Both of their futures are now brighter, thanks to a successful kidney transplant last month.

In October of last year, Emme was on a family vacation. On her way home, she started to get sharp pains in her side. Symptoms of nausea persisted throughout the month. She lost her appetite and became lethargic. Emme went to see a gastroenterologist, who was able to diagnose the first sign of serious trouble.

She was facing end-stage renal failure due to an autoimmune disease, vasculitis, an inflammation of the blood vessels.

"The inflammation can cause the walls of the blood vessels to thicken, which reduces the width of the passageway through the vessel," according to the Mayo Clinic. "If blood flow is restricted, it can result in organ and tissue damage."

The vasculitis attacked the young woman's kidneys, lungs and liver, with the majority of the damage centered on her kidneys, Emme said. By November, she started getting treatment.

Bob and Emme tried to handle the news the best that they could. They joked around with each other and tried to keep each other’s spirits up, but neither of them really understood just how serious Emme’s condition was.

"I knew she was sick, but you really couldn’t tell it because she was very positive and strong throughout the entire process," Bob said.

"I was just kind of shocked," Emme said. "I was so new to being sick and I didn’t know any of the medical terms. It just kind of shocked me, and I still didn’t believe it until I was put on dialysis a couple of days later."

Emme spent three weeks in Silver Cross Hospital that November. Doctors administered chemotherapy to try to keep the vasculitis under control.

Emme showed signs of improvement after that, but a flareup in March led doctors to perform another biopsy. That’s when they discovered that both kidneys were “gone” and she would need a kidney transplant, Bob said.

The doctors at Silver Cross suggested to the Wards that they should seek out a transplant team they were comfortable with, Bob said. That led the Wards to Rush University Medical Center in Chicago.

"They reviewed her case, took her on, and we were very fortunate throughout the entire process that it had gone so quickly," Bob said.

"Quickly" might be something of an understatement. The wait list for a kidney is a long one. In fact, Emme has a friend, Danny, who has been on that waiting list for five years.

Emme started dialysis treatment three days a week that March. Dialysis helped keep her going for the next six months but, eventually, she would need a working kidney.

Emme was fortunate that doctors were able to avoid the usual three to five year wait, the average time for a kidney transplant, according to the National Kidney Foundation.

The Wards and the transplant team at Rush decided they wanted to try to find a living kidney donor, which in itself is no guarantee. There are a number of factors to determine if someone is a match for the kidney transplant, including blood type, health history and whether a candidate is likely to survive the procedure.

Members of the Ward family from all over volunteered to undergo tests to find out if they would be a match for Emme. By early June, they had found a living donor: Bob.

"It was very shocking when he told me he was a match," Emme said. "Before that, there were so many family members who were getting tested, and I just couldn’t believe that people were willing to get tested for me. I was just overwhelmed from all the love and support I was getting. And once I found out that my dad tested positive to be a match, I immediately started crying because I couldn’t believe he was willing to do that for me. And it still blows my mind. I have his kidney inside me right now, and I still can’t believe it."

"I was ecstatic," Bob said. "The first test is essentially a blood test. And Emme’s mom [Bob’s ex-wife] was the first one to get tested, and the next day she found out she wasn’t a match. I can’t even imagine her feeling at that point of helplessness, 'I can’t help my daughter.'"

Bob continued, "About two or three days later is when I got tested to see if my blood would match, and that fear was going through my head, like, 'Oh my gosh. If I’m not the person, then how am I going to react to not being able to step up and help my daughter.'"

More tests were needed to confirm Bob's ability to be a living donor, and it was full steam ahead for him to get those tests done and help save Emme's life.

"We were extremely fortunate that, a) we were able to find the right place, and b) that I was actually able to be a donor because that rarely happens to find a living donor in the family," Bob said. "So, yeah, it’s been a crazy six months, that’s for sure."

With little time to waste, Emme was scheduled to have the kidney transplant on Sept. 22. Just as it looked like smooth sailing, a schedule change forced the transplant back a week to Sept. 29.

With that resolved, Bob went under first at around 9 a.m. When his part was over, Emme would have her surgery to receive his kidney.

Before Bob headed in for surgery, the father and daughter had a couple of brief moments together.

"I met him the morning of the surgery, and we just kind of hung out and talked," Emme said. "It felt so unreal, like nothing major was about to happen. When he got called into the room, it started to feel more real. Then I got called in and my stepmom came into my room and said that he went into surgery. And it was just a weird feeling. It was a very overwhelming day, but it all happened so quickly that I couldn’t really process it."

Bob was under for about four to five hours, he said. When he woke, the first thing he did was ask about Emme. The doctors told Bob that the transplant was a success and Emme was doing fine.

"The first time I got to see Emme was when I Facetimed her that night," Bob said. "She looked completely different. She looked extremely happy and healthy again. Her face changed."

The next morning, before Emme was moved to the intensive care unit for recovery, she made a stop at Bob’s room. It was the first time the father and daughter were back together again, in the flesh.

"She was all happy and perky," Bob said, adding that he was having some trouble with acid reflux after the surgery, and that Emme appeared to be doing better than he was. "It was really, really good to see her. We hung out for a little bit before she finally went back to the room for the night. And then they kicked me out. I got to leave later that day."

Both Emme and Bob are recovering well. Each has their own team of doctors monitoring their progress, and things are looking good so far. Emme is already back to driving and visiting family. Bob is back to coaching.

"It's crazy to think because I haven’t felt this good in a year, and I didn't think I'd ever feel this good again," Emme said.

Doctors have told the Wards that Emme's kidney could last as long as 15-20 years, but she will probably need another one at some point in the future, Bob said.

"But with the way medical science is going nowadays, in 15 years, who knows. They might have artificial ones by then," Bob said.

In the meantime, the Wards are hoping to help spread the word about becoming a living donor. They have both started advocating for the National Kidney Foundation. The pair even had T-shirts made that read "Emme's Army." They donated the money they raised from the sale of those T-shirts to the National Kidney Foundation.

"I wish people would maybe look into it more, and if I can help in any way, I would love to start doing that," Bob said. "I'll be honest with you: I never once thought of [being a living donor]. Ever. I didn’t know you even could do that."

Bob said that he hopes people will hear about his and Emme’s experience and want to learn more about being a living donor. Bob suggested that people who are interested in becoming living donors should first talk to their doctors about it.

"If you wanted to go ahead and give someone a better chance at life, giving up a kidney is not that terrible of a thing," Bob said. "In my experience, these 10 days [of surgery and recovery] have not been horrible. Yeah, it's a major surgery and stuff like that. People react differently. I understand that, too. But, for the price of my daughter being healthy again, it's been nothing, absolutely nothing.

"Everybody keeps saying, 'Oh, you’re a hero, you’re a hero.' I'm not a hero. Any parent would do this for their child, I would hope anyway. And that's just the way I've gone about it. Take them both for all I care, as long as it gets her better."

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