Dating In Summit: Best Restaurants, Dos & Dont's From A Local Resident

SUMMIT, NJ — When Jennifer Cameron moved to Summit from Dallas, Texas after ending a long-term relationship three years ago, she took to online dating to establish some roots in the community.

With the holidays now approaching, Summit locals may be looking for the perfect date spots in town, or they may just be a looking for a date. Cameron, 61, a former T.V. journalist, has found success with online dating and spoke with Patch about some of the "dos and don'ts" she has learned along the way.

Favorite Restaurants, Date Spots Around Summit

She also dished about some of her favorite restaurants and date spots downtown.

"When I first got here, I fell in love with Summit just because of its availability to the downtown," Cameron said. "For me, dating was kind of a means to an end. It allowed me to explore not only Summit but Chatham, Madison and Morristown."

She said going on dates with someone who was more familiar with the community allowed her to explore and learn more about the downtown.

"The worst that can happen is I have a free beer with a guy who I have absolutely no chemistry with," Cameron said. "But I get to try a killer hamburger at Revolution in Morristown, [or] I get to try the killer scallops at The Huntley Tavern [in Summit]."

Besides the upscale Huntley Tavern, Cameron recommends Office Tavern & Grille in Summit, which she said is "not too pretentious" and a great place to watch sports games. She said watching sports with a date is also a way to spark some conversation.

She also recommends Summit House, known for its wide range of cocktails, as well as Fin Raw Bar and Kitchen, which Cameron said is "really intimate." Although they do not have a liquor license, Cameron said Fin allows customers to pick up drinks from Fiorino's across the street and bring it into the restaurant.

For those looking to do activities with their date, Cameron recommended Scotty's Pub and Comedy Cove in Springfield.

"What's great about dating and seeing a comedy show is now you have something to talk or to laugh about," Cameron said. "You don't have to hold a conversation with somebody across the table."

Online Dating, How To Be Wary Of Scammers

She said going to the Summit Farmer's Market is also a great place to meet people. But for those who are more introverted, Cameron recommends using online dating apps — even for people who are over the age of 55, like herself.

Cameron said she uses the apps Tinder, Bumble and Hinge the most. In the past, she has used paid services like Match.com, but she said the same people tend to be on the free apps.

But Cameron said people need to be wary of scammers when online dating. Typically, she has found that if a person says they are an "oil and gas engineer out at sea" or a petroleum engineer, they might be a catfish or a scammer.

If someone asks for your phone number right away, Cameron said that could be a bad sign.

"What I recommend to people is don't give your phone number out so quickly," Cameron said. "Meet someplace in person first, get an idea that they're worthy of your phone number and then decide if you want to give it to [them]."

Even if you a block someone's number, Cameron said a person can still spam you with voicemails, which she said she had experienced from a stalker.

Another important tip, Cameron said, is to not text and call someone for too long. Try to "see them in their natural habitat" and meet in person, Cameron suggested.

"If you meet in person you can see [if] they lied about what they look like or [if] are they mean to waitresses," she said.

According to Insider, a sign that someone is catfish is if they refuse to video chat with you or can never send you a selfie in the moment.

Nev Schulman, host of the TV show "Catfish," said in an interview with Texas47 TV that if you are concerned that the person you are communicating with is a catfish, asking for a photo of them doing something or holding something specific is a good idea because it's unlikely that they will be able to find a photo like that.

Insider added that if the person never wants to meet up in person, that could be a red flag, as well.

Dating Tips For 55+ Community

For people over the age of 55, Cameron said dating can be a difficult thing to jump into, especially if they are coming out of a long-term marriage or relationship.

"I think there are people at my age who may have been married for 30 years and don't have a freaking clue how to date because they just had one spouse for a long time," Cameron said. "So it takes practice. You have to get out there and practice."

For older people who are looking to date but are skeptical about online dating, Cameron said "no one is going to come knocking on your door."

She said she has often heard people suggest going to church or even to the grocery store to find potential mates. But Cameron finds it difficult to meet people in these settings, particularly if you are more introverted.

"I personally believe that a hard thing about dating in those social groups of people who know you is that when it doesn't work out, [it becomes] a very awkward social group to be a part of," Cameron explained. "So that's why I like the idea of online dating because you can separate what you normally enjoy doing with this dating thing. So if it doesn't work out, you won't give up what you normally enjoy doing."

Cameron said she hears people complain that online dating "takes too much time and effort." But she said if a person isn't willing to put in effort to find a relationship, then they likely will not have one.

Creating a detailed dating profile is also something that Cameron recommends. Just saying "I like cats" and adding a few photos, for example, is not going to cut it in the dating world, Cameron said.

"If people don't put the effort into the bio, then I say, 'well, I don't know what kind of effort he's going to put in when the relationship gets more mature."

Certified dating coach Damona Hoffman confirmed this idea and told NPR that finding a partner on an app — just like in the real world — takes time, effort and openness.

Hoffman said that your dating profile is "the most important piece of your online dating experience," but you should not let that intimidate you.

According to NPR, Hoffman said when making a dating profile, you should focus the three C's: a colorful mix of quality photos, context about those photos, and character — letting your personality shine through.

Hoffman added that people should steer clear of oversharing, cringe-worthy bathroom selfies and wasting too much space talking about what you want or don't want in a partner.

Overall, Cameron said her online dating experience has been "really positive." She said online dating is the only real option for her because she isn't a part of many clubs and doesn't have any family in the community.

"It's the tool that kind of makes sense for me and also people who are introverts and not really outgoing," Cameron said.

She argued that it's either to thumb through options on your phone while you're sitting at home, as opposed to trying to meet someone at a bar where you don't know who's actually married or is looking to date.

Despite online dating for nearly decade, Cameron said she has made a lot of mistakes along the way, but has learned a lot in the process.

Author and advice columnist John Paul Brammer confirmed this notion that online dating is not easy and that searching for a partner can isolating and lonely at times.

He told NPR loneliness is very common and that it is hard to find meaningful connections that you want to hold onto for a long time.

You can read about more dating tips from Brammer and Hoffman on NPR's podcast.

Have a news tip? Email remy.samuels@patch.com.