Tight-Knit Town Shaken Over Troubling News

Though only 45 miles from New York City, the small village of Katonah is a world away from the violence that is more commonplace there.

As the news of the brutal stabbing of two young girls—unheard of and unthinkable here—rippled through town, the community processed the news in different ways.

The girls, daughters of Joseph and Eva Kelly of Katonah were attacked by their aunt, 39-year-old Lisa Turkki, while in her care Saturday night. They are recovering at the Westchester Medical Center. Turkki is being held at the county jail without bail.

At the town day camp where both girls have been attending since late June, counselors were briefed on the news and told not to discuss it at all today in order to prevent misinformation from spreading, said Kim O'Brien, recreation leader.

Recreation officials met Sunday and decided that any specifics given to children should come from parents. Some parents told their  children that the two girls had 'an accident but would be OK,' said O'Brien.

By the end of day, no children or parents had approached their counselors or town leaders about it. "We're trying to keep it as normal as possible," she said.

Officials at Katonah Elementary School sent out an email to the school community today, informing them of the incident and offering the services of a district school psychologist or social worker this week to provide guidance to families.

One resident said that the news had hit people very personally in the tight-knit community.

"This is the kind of town people move to so they can know their neighbors—their pain is our pain," she said, declining to give her name. Mothers of children who know the girls may be concerned about how much to tell their kids, too, she added.

If young children don't probe for more information, it's wise to let them be, said Katonah-based child psychiatrist Dr. Mark Banschick.

"Kids assume that adults keep them safe and events like this can undo those feelings for a while," he said. "Unfortunately, news like this reaches most ears at some time."

Banschick offered the following advice for parents struggling with how to approach the situation:

• Even the bare minium of information trickled down to children may manifest in unusual ways. Watch for signs of anxiety, including children becoming needier, calling out in the middle of the night, even regressing to habits overcome such as bed-wetting or thumb-sucking.
• Extra time spent with children will help reassure them of their safety with adults. Extra TLC goes a long way—give all you can.
• If children have heard more than should, it's OK to say sometimes sad people do bad things, but that should be followed by:  'we are here to protect you and things like that rarely happen,' especially with older children who need truthfulness from their parents.
• If needed, adults should seek supports, too. Parents need to take their own pulse: are they feeling anxious about leaving their children? Are they projecting anxiety or confidence? Remember that incidents like this are rare.
• Don't give more information than you need to, especially to young children. A child may say 'what happened to my friend?' and instead of responding with details, you might ask 'what's bothering you?' which may be more helpful in getting the child to talk and feel better.

Counseling services will be offered to school families at KES on Tuesday from 9 a.m. – 1 p.m.; Wednesday from 1 p.m. – 3 p.m. and Thursday from 9 a.m. – 12 p.m. For more information, call 914.763.7700.