Gifts are Bumming me Out. Am I a Grinch?

The holidays are meant to be a time of joy, connection, and togetherness, yet for many of us, the experience of holiday shopping has become a strange, almost uncomfortable ritual. It’s as though the deeper, more personal meaning of gift-giving has been lost in a sea of Amazon Prime deals, marketing gimmicks, and the subtle but persistent pressure to buy more and more.

We all know the drill. Black Friday deals blur into Cyber Monday, and suddenly, everyone is seeing the same sales… often on the same products. The promise of a perfect gift feels hollow when it’s just a matter of catching the best deal before someone else does. The magic of giving has become a transaction, more about the exchange of money than the exchange of love or thoughtfulness.

The most absurd part of this entire system is how financial constraints, something that’s often out of our control, dictate how much love we’re perceived to have for someone. When your budget is tight, your gifts become smaller, more generic, and perhaps less meaningful. In a world where social media often shows us the perfectly wrapped presents or extravagant gifts others are giving, it can feel like your limited budget is a reflection of your limited affection. That is just awful…

There’s something profoundly wrong with the idea that the depth of your love is quantifiable by the price tag of a gift. It shouldn’t matter how much you spend—what should matter is the thought behind the gesture, the shared moments, and the effort you put into making someone feel seen and appreciated. But in the capitalist driven holiday landscape, the financial cost often overshadows the emotional one.

Buying a gift, whether it's a high-end gadget or a discounted sweater, has become an impersonal transaction. Instead of focusing on what would truly make the recipient happy or reflect a personal bond, the act often boils down to choosing from a list of what’s trending or popular on a site like Amazon. The human connection—the thoughtful exchange that used to come with a carefully chosen present—has been replaced by a kind of generic convenience. Everyone’s getting the same deals, which makes the entire process feel less about the people involved and more about the products themselves.

Gifts should be about the time and energy you spend thinking about someone. Yet more often than not, they are just objects that exist in a vacuum, devoid of deeper meaning. Whether it's a sweater, a gadget, or a subscription, these things are no substitute for real human connection. A truly meaningful gift isn’t something you can buy with one-click shopping. It’s something born out of shared experiences, memories, or simple, thoughtful gestures that show you truly see and understand the person you're gifting to.

And then, there’s the gift card. Often regarded as the easy way out, a gift card can feel like an admission of failure, a way of saying, “I couldn’t find the perfect gift, but here’s money for you to buy whatever you want.” It can be interpreted as a lack of creativity or effort, a mere transactional gesture that feels impersonal, even cold.

But maybe there’s another perspective to consider. In a world where we are all drowning in options, the gift card offers a form of agency and freedom. It allows the recipient to choose what they truly want or need, eliminating the uncertainty and pressure that comes with picking the wrong gift. For some, it’s actually a way of respecting their autonomy and giving them the gift of choice. And perhaps in its simplicity, a gift card reflects the value of time together more than a material possession could. Maybe the best present is the opportunity to go out, share an experience, and create a memory, rather than simply exchanging goods.

Ultimately, the modern approach to gift-giving feels like a byproduct of capitalism; something that encourages overconsumption and distorts the true spirit of the holidays. Gifts are no longer about the joy of giving or receiving but about status, competition, and fitting into a cultural mold. The pressure to buy and give is amplified by social media, advertisements, and the constant bombardment of “deal” messages, making it difficult to enjoy the holidays for what they should be: a time for genuine connection and rest.

The irony, of course, is that while we’ve all been trained to buy and buy in order to show our affection, the true gift might just be something far simpler: our time, attention, and care. A holiday shouldn’t be defined by what we can afford, but by how we choose to spend it—with the people we love, without the weight of consumer expectations.

Anyway, I’m buying you a gift card.

Happy Holidays!