Survivor's Message: Don't Let Fear Take Over

Karen Kyser does not want to be the face of breast cancer awareness. She doesn't even want to be the voice of experience, because she says every experience is different.

But she does have one message: Don't let fear dictate your actions and decisions, even if you get a breast cancer diagnosis.

"I just don't want people to be so frightened," said Kyser who is entering her fourth year as a survivor.

She said she discovered a lump in her breast while in the shower. She made an appointment with her gynecologist who told her he "was 99 percent sure it was a fibroid," Kyser said. But he wanted to do an ultrasound to be sure.

After the ultrasound the doctors told her she needed a biopsy. She went through each step, she said.

She never had that searing feeling of fear, "that white hot heat of lightning," until she heard the diagnosis: "Cancer."

But Kyser, who was diagnosed with stage 2 cancer, said, the point is not to put off doctors appoints and tests because you fear the results. The idea she said is that getting tested can lead to an early diagnosis and than can save lives.

After Kyser got over the initial shock of the diagnosis, she immediately made an appointment for Moffitt Cancer Center where they found that she had cancer in both breasts. She said at that was the beginning of a "forced march through hell"

"Not just for me," she said, "but for the people who are with you and who are watching you." Kyser is a single mom and her son was 11 when she found the tumor.

She said she had a lot of friends who helped her get through the diagnosis and treatment. Their support really made a huge difference she said.

Kyser, who works in city hall with the Downtown Development Authority, said she'll never forget the day she started chemotherapy. She had worked that day and was still tired after having surgery. And she was afraid of the chemotherapy and what was to come.

But when she stepped outside of city hall, an huge group of employees and friends had already gathered outside and they were all wearing pink bandanas to show their support for her. That really helped her get through that day, she said.

"You get through it," said said of that march through hell.

The two greatest gifts that helped her get through are her family and her faith, she said.

"My faith in Jesus Christ helped me rise above and trust in him and to know that it's not my plan," she said."As with anything else in life when you're handed something not so pleasant, instead of running in fear, you've got to think of it as a chllenge and you're going to grab it as tight as you can. None of us knows the outcome."

Her mother had gone through breast cancer just a few years earlier and she helped Kyser get through everything.

"She was a major support," Kyser said. "She is tremendously strong."

She admits it wasn't easy to grab tight to the challenge when she was going though the rigors of chemotherapy. Now Kyser said she wants to "pay it forward."

"Some days I just stop and I remember and then I realize how good I feel," she said. "It's so good to feel good."

She has had opportunities to talk with people who have been diagnosed with breast cancer or some other cancer and she simply tries to reassure them.

"I find myself mostly listening," she said. "I will grab someone and pull them in and give them a big hug and be reassuring. It's good to know that there's someone that can understand what you're going through"

Kyser is also part of a cancer study group at Moffitt. Her hope is that be participating in the study, researchers will find the answers they need to find a cure or a vaccine or something that will prevent other women from having to go through the experiences she went through.

Still she realizes for now "it's out there an it's scary." But her message to "anyone who is concerned or afraid: Don't be."

"There's so much out there and a lot that can be fixed," she said. "If someone is diagnosed, you, your mother or a sister, be aware. See what you can do."

And now that she is entering her fourth year as a survivor she pushes back the subconscious fear that cancer might return. "You've got to keep it in check."

Instead she remembers that she is fortunate to have family, friends and a great job doing something she loves.

"You have got to go through life and enjoy every day," she said. "My goal is to make a difference in somebody's life every day. I do that because so many people in my life had made a big difference."