Beat a Cyberbully:

While remote learning during the COVID-19 pandemic lowered reported instances of bullying, parents fear that for some students, going back to school will mean going back to being bullied.

“We are very concerned about cyberbullying because we live in a day and age where anything you say and do can be uploaded onto a social media platform and be displayed for everyone to see. They can be teased, made fun of, shamed about anything – whether it’s good or bad. Our kids are in school, and they see examples of that all the time," said Anthony Jones, a father of four who lives in Ecorse, Michigan.

Now 15 years after the inception of National Bullying Prevention Month in October, technology’s ever-greater presence in children’s lives has given bullying a new outlet. With just a click, cyberbullies can taunt, harass and threaten relentlessly, even reaching into the home via cellphone or computer. As a result, victims report feeling hopeless, isolated and even suicidal.

What can parents do to protect their kids? Taking an interest in their children’s online world can make a difference, says the National Parent Teacher Association.

This interest does not necessarily require parents to become tech experts. Instead, the federal stopbullying.gov site advises parents to watch for subtle clues that something is wrong, such as their child becoming withdrawn, hiding their screen when others are nearby or reacting emotionally to what’s happening on their device.

For Anthony and his wife Nicole, this includes understanding normal behavior to detect if something is wrong with their three school-age children, ages 14, 11 and 7. “We try to watch our kids; we know their personalities, what they are like at the start of the day and at the conclusion. When we go and pick them up from school we know each and every one of their mannerisms, how they react, how they should be after school. If they act out of character, we know there is something there and we can address those matters immediately. We invite them to talk to us, and try to draw out what’s going on with them so we can take care of it,” said Anthony.

Talking with kids openly — and often — helps too. “The more you talk to your children about bullying, the more comfortable they will be telling you if they see or experience it,” UNICEF says in its online tips for parents.

Anthony and Nicole strive to encourage open communication and remain approachable with their kids. “One way we do that is after their personal Bible study, we’ll ask is there anything you want to say? How are you feeling emotionally? How are you feeling physically?” said Anthony. “We’ve always told them that if they come to us in a respectful manner, we won’t judge them and they won’t be in trouble for anything they have to say,” commented Nicole.

Beyond talking, listening and observing their kids, parents shouldn’t be afraid to make and enforce rules for online activities, experts say.

“When we got the devices, we blocked certain things; we told them to only communicate with certain individuals and warned of potential dangers,” said Anthony. Their daughter’s phone has a security measure that allows only the parents to program the contacts, limiting communication with unapproved persons.

Regarding online activities, the Jones children have their age-appropriate accounts on Netflix and YouTube. “They have that freedom to still choose what they want to watch because we taught them from a young age what they should or should not watch,” said Anthony.

Anthony and Nicole openly communicate with their kids to help them understand the limits are in place for their safety. “We help them see the dangers that could result if they are not careful, and if there aren't security measures set up, there are potential risks that can hurt you,” states Anthony.

The oldest child acknowledged, "I know it's to help and protect me, so I don't try to go around it." Another child expressed, "They are trying to keep us safe."

The Jones family cited the tips and reminders they’ve considered together from free resources available on jw.org, the official website of Jehovah’s Witnesses.

“One of our favorite videos on the website is ‘Beat a Bully Without Using Your Fists.’ That was an excellent whiteboard animation! It was very informational and simple to understand. It gave specific instructions on how to handle a bully,” commented Anthony.