NYC Is Not Trying To Ban Toilet Paper, George Santos

NEW YORK CITY — A dry sense of humor apparently doesn't flush well with George Santos, who warned followers New York City Democrats want to ban toilet paper.

Allow us to unclog your memory: This was an April Fool's Day joke from City Council Member Erik Bottcher.

"Republicans are working to put Americans First...Democrats are busy trying to ban toilet paper and gas stoves," said Santos, the U.S. Representative who falsely claimed to play volleyball for Baruch and was accused of taking $3,000 from a disabled veteran's dying dog.

"We need to remind politicians that they work for We The People."

Bottcher, a Democrat who represents Manhattan's west side and proposed last April Fool's Day to replace cars with golf carts, was deeply offended. Or, not.

Predictably, Bottcher's followers replied with reminders of Europe's answer to maintenance and care of the derrière.

"In all seriousness, bidets are better for the environment (and plumbing) than TP," wrote Queens Cra--er. "And you're good if/when there's another TP shortage."

For those unaware, a joke is when you say or do something exaggerated or untrue to elicit laughter. We'll explain that one...next April's Fools Day.