Last-Minute NYC Father's Day 2023: Gifts, Plans, Excuses

NEW YORK CITY — Oh no, it's Father's Day and you forgot to get your dad a gift! What do you do?

Cool your jets, kid. There's always plenty of dad stuff to do in New York City. (And if you're not here, why not?)

History, big naval ships, golf, big honking steaks —the Big Apple has your last-minute Father's Day needs covered.

Patch has thrown together a quick guide for those horrible, horrible children who forgot about Father's Day until it was too late. And we also have a guide of only-in-New York excuses — really, dad jokes — for why you couldn't even remember to get him socks.

Dads love the sea, it's just a fact.

Thankfully, New York City is surrounded by both water and dad things to do in that water.

When's the last time you went to the Statue of Liberty?

We're serious — it may sound super touristy (it is), but tickets to the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island check a lot of dad boxes.

Water and boats? Check.

Freedom? Check.

History? Check, check and check.

Another great maritime option is the Intrepid Sea, Air & Space Museum.

Don't try to pretend that being on board a former aircraft carrier that served in World War II, the Cold War and the Vietnam War isn't something your dad would want to do. The museum also has the only American guided missile submarine open to the public, a prototype Space Shuttle and more.

Another great history-focused option is more landlocked, but slightly overlooked.

New York Public Library's main branch — technically, the Stephen A. Schwarzman Building — is a piece of history and an architectural marvel itself, right in the heart of Manhattan at Fifth Avenue and 42nd Street.

And behind its familiar facade lies a trove of historic treasures.

The Polonsky Exhibition displays a copy of Declaration of Independence handwritten by Thomas Jefferson, a Gutenberg Bible, and many, many more items.

The branch is open from 1 p.m. to 5 p.m. on Father's Day.

Maybe golf is more your dad's speed.

Instead of trying to hit the links in The Bronx, Long Island or New Jersey, how about a more leisurely tee time at Chelsea Piers?

Golf range sessions on Father's Day start at 7 a.m. for $40.

Finally, nothing says "Happy Father's Day" like a steak dinner.

Because Patch isn't Resy, you're mostly on your own when it comes to finding a steakhouse with open reservations Sunday.

But we did find a $109.95-per-person Father's Day four-course meal being offered by both Empire Steak House locations in Midtown.

Let's say those suggestions don't work for you.

Let's also say your dad is coming soon and you still have no gift, no nothing for him on Father's Day.

Then these only-in-New York excuses crafted by Patch's problem children.

• The alligators in the sewer ate your present.
• Eric Adams banned presents.
• Weekend subway work delayed your present.
• Your present was supposed to be "affordable" then required I make 120 percent AMI.
• Pizza Rat ran off with your present.
• I wouldn't have forgotten your gift if this good-for-nothing city had a Presents Czar.
• It's de Blasio's fault I didn't get you a present.
• Oh God, your present is suddenly orange. Why is your present orange??
• Don't blame me, I voted to Get Presents Done.