X-Rated Cheeseburger Heist; Deadly Sidewalk Ice; Bronx Marble-Hurling Spree: Patch PM

NEW YORK, NY — The further below freezing the mercury dropped this Monday, Jan. 9, the weirder the city crime reports. (Coincidence? We think not.) Here are the top 10 local news stories — pulled from our 28 neighborhood Patch sites across NYC — worth talking about as you thaw your appendages around the dinner table tonight.

Brooklyn 7-Eleven Thief Stuffs White Castle Cheeseburger In His Pants

The cheeseburger thief is facing stiff charges for his alleged stunt in Crown Heights: petit larceny, criminal mischief, criminal possession of stolen property and resisting arrest.

Bronx Hooligans Hurl Marbles At Storefronts In Destructive Spree

The drive-by criminals threw more than two dozen marbles at 28 businesses in the Bronx in just a 90-minute period — breaking the glass windows of several restaurants, a parked car, an MTA bus, a Target and more, police say.

Year's First Subway Slashing Reported On Upper West Side

At the West 72nd Street station.

5 to 8 Inches Of Snow Fell Across NYC This Weekend

Queens got the worst of it.

Developer Wants To Incorporate Public Brooklyn Park Into Luxury Building

Some Greenpoint residents are furious over what they see as the developer's attempt to use public money for private good.

Taxi Driver Rapes Passenger In Sunset Park: Police

A 29-year-old woman was raped by her cab driver after he demanded her money at knifepoint in broad daylight Saturday, the victim told police.

Mark Ruffalo Helps De Blasio Kick Off Mayoral Campaign With Fancy Fundraising Dinner

Tickets for the Wednesday night fundraiser in SoHo reportedly start at $100 — and those who donate $1,000 or more will gain exclusive access to a "VIP Reception."

Man Dies After Slipping On Icy Upper East Side Street, Police Say

The victim had been walking along East 73rd Street near 2nd Avenue, police say.

NYC Restaurant Week Coming Up: Browse Deals, Make Rezzies

The twice-yearly promotion, which allows New Yorkers to score high-quality meals for equally delectable prices, will be held from Jan.23 through Feb. 10.

Chuck Schumer's Park Slope Home Turning Into Popular Protest Spot

Looks like the moneyed residents of Prospect Park West up near Grand Army Plaza may have to get used to a semi-regular angry mob shouting angry stuff at Sen. Chuck Schumer from the sidewalk beneath his apartment building.