Mom Talk Q&A: What Age Should a Child Get a Cell Phone?

Moms Talk is a new feature on Wantagh-Seaford Patch, part of a new initiative on our Patch sites to reach out to moms and families.

Wantagh-Seaford Patch invites you and your circle of friends to help build a community of support for mothers and their families.

Each week in Moms Talk, our Moms Council of experts and smart moms will take your questions, give advice and share solutions.

Moms, dads, grandparents and the diverse families who make up our community will have a new resource for questions about local neighborhood schools, the best pediatricians, 24-hour pharmacies and the thousands of other issues that arise while raising children.

Moms Talk will also be the place to drop in for a chat about the latest parenting hot topic. Where can we get information on local flu shot clinics for children? How do we talk to our children about the Tucson shootings? How can we help our children's schools weather their budget cutbacks?

This week's question is, " What age is it appropriate to get your child a cell phone? Some parents may feel a child should get a cell phone at a young age so they can better track where they are but others may feel they should wait until an older age. What do you think?

Moms Council members are online to chat with you! Please use the comment box below for questions, or to share your experiences and the lessons you have learned.

The Wantagh-Seaford Patch Moms Council consists of Kathy Tariche, Roberta Grogan, Diane Wenz, Yvonne Sinisgalli and Corri Lincker.

Below is response to this question submitted in advance by Roberta Grogan:

When is an appropriate age for a child to get their first cell phone?  An interesting question and one which is particularly timely, as I have sons in fifth and seventh grade presently.  My husband and I are on the same page with this topic.  We felt that upon exiting elementary school and entering middle school, we would provide our kids with their first cell phones.  We found shortly thereafter, that it was not the act of providing the cell phone that presented the challenge; it was the “approved uses” for the phone that became the “negotiating points.”

We as parents felt providing the cell phone was an added level of communication as our oldest moved to a different school building wherein independence is promoted.  We were faced with a double edged sword, our oldest has some social deficits and the presence of a cell phone could work two ways.  We wanted to insure that it was a positive experience, so at first, the numbers programmed into the phone were just ours and two emergency contacts.  If after school schedules changed, or if an earlier or later pick up from a social function was needed.  An unexpected result of the limited usage was that the novelty of having a cell phone was diminished relatively quickly and that we were able to slowly increase the allowable usage.

Now, certain friends’ numbers have been added as well as additional family members, to the allowed calls (parentally controlled).  It has been a really good experience with regard to learning as we go along for both parent and teen.   Over usage has not been a problem (yet?!) and actually there have been times when our son’s cell phone has proven to be of great assistance to us all.  Lessons in responsibility have been taught and learned as well as social dynamics. 

The younger guy graduates elementary school this year…I already see the new challenge on the horizon.  No longer, it seems, is it a question of “when “for the cell phone, apparently that has been an assumed “given.”  Now, the “type” of phone, the newest with all the gadgets heavily marketed on television and in printed form, seems to be the next battle on the horizon.  I already have the “when I was a kid we had to walk a zillion miles just to find a pay phone to put our dime in to make the call….”  Lord, give me the strength.