Do It Like My Old Therapist…” 🚩 Here’s How Pros Handle It

Do It Like My Old Therapist…” 🚩 Here’s How Pros Handle It
Some clients walk in with pain… and immediately start directing the session:
“My old therapist did it this way. Use this technique. Press here. Copy that routine.”
Here’s the truth: a professional therapist isn’t there to “recreate your last massage.”
They’re there to assess, choose the right approach, and deliver their clinical process—based on your body today, not someone else’s style.

Why “teaching the therapist” is a problem

• It turns the session into guesswork, not professional care
• Your previous therapist’s routine may be wrong for your current condition
• It removes accountability: if you direct everything, you can end up unhappy and still in pain
• It blocks the most important thing: assessment + therapist’s plan

What clients SHOULD do instead

✅ Share facts, not instructions:

• “This is where it hurts.”
• “This movement triggers it.”
• “Deep pressure made it worse / better.”
• “I prefer lighter pressure.”
• “I’m sensitive in this area.” That’s helpful information. But the technique? That’s the therapist’s job.

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How therapists can handle it (real scripts you can use)

1) The polite reset (friendly + professional)

“Totally hear you. Every therapist works differently. I’ll ask a few questions, do a quick assessment, and then I’ll choose the best approach for your body today.”

2) The boundary with options (calm + firm)

“I can’t copy another therapist’s routine step-by-step. What I can do is focus on your goal—pain reduction and better movement. If you want, tell me what felt helpful and what didn’t.”

3) The “I’m responsible for outcomes” line (strong)

“Since I’m responsible for your safety and results, I need to lead the session. I’ll always listen to feedback during the work—pressure, comfort, and pain—just not technique directions.”

4) The redirect to collaboration (keeps them involved)

“Let’s do it this way: you tell me what you feel, and I’ll adjust the plan in real time. Deal?”

5) If they won’t stop (final boundary)

“If you need a session directed exactly like your previous therapist, I may not be the best fit. I can either continue with my approach—or we can end today and help you find someone who matches that style.”

6) When it becomes disrespectful (refuse service)

“I want to keep this professional and respectful. If the coaching continues, I’ll need to end the session.”

My take on the situation

Clients “backseat-driving” usually comes from fear (they hurt) or control (they don’t trust the process yet). So I’d do two things:

1. Validate: “I get why you’re specific—you’ve tried a lot.”
2. Lead: “I’ll take it from here, and I’ll explain what I’m doing.”

A good therapist is confident without arguing, and a good client shares feedback without running the session.

Call-to-action (to spark comments)

Now I want your opinion 👇

• Have you ever had a client say: “Do it like my old therapist”? What did you say?
• If you’re a client: what made you feel like you needed to control the session?
• Should therapists allow “coaching,” or is it a red flag?

Drop your story in the comments—we’ll feature the best answers in the next blog/video.

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