❄️ 'Unreasonably Cold And Snowy' 🤬 + Haslams Speak Up On Deshaun + Joe Charboneau Busted

The winter of our discontent will be upon us in four months, says the Farmers' Almanac, and we apparently will be very discontented with our snowfall and cold temps. Deshaun Watson may be back on the field by then, however. Here's your news:

• The Haslams had unusual things to say Thursday 😦
• Thomas Polak's RTA rides are as unreasonable as our winter is going to be
• Say it ain't so, Super Joe — 1980s Indians legend busted in Berea

Also, luggage thieves were caught at Hopkins Airport. Gotcha! 🙌

🌤️ Mostly sunny and pleasant. High: 83, Low: 70

'Unreasonably Cold And Snowy' Winter In Cleveland's Future: Farmers' Almanac

1) Why can't every day be like today? The Farmers' Almanac — with a 72 percent overall accuracy rate — says Cleveland should brace for an "unreasonably cold and snowy" winter. ❄️❄️❄️ To the west, out in Iowa, Nebraska and the Dakotas, the Almanac predicts "hibernation zone glacial," so I guess we're lucky we don't live on the windswept plains. January 2023 is expected to be the stormiest part of Ohio's winter.

Cleveland Scene

2) Cleveland Browns quarterback Deshaun Watson and the NFL agreed to an 11-game suspension and a $5 million fine for his violations of the league's misconduct policy — specifically his aberrant sexual behavior with dozens of massage therapists. Owners Jimmy and Dee Haslam addressed the press on Thursday after the agreement was announced:

“I just want to say that we as an organization and as individuals, we have tremendous empathy for the women involved. We have an opportunity now to make a difference in this community. We are going to invest $1 million to go towards educating the youth for awareness of sexual misconduct. We are going to work really hard on (intervention), and we are looking forward to getting involved and getting started on that.”

Dee Haslam

Jimmy Haslam says the Browns would "absolutely" trade for Watson again knowing everything they now know about him and his habit of thrusting his genitals at massage therapists.

Cleveland.com

3) Thomas Polak's RTA Paratransit rides — which should take about 10 minutes — are taking about an hour and a half. WTH? He uses the paratransit program — a service for disabled persons who need public transportation — five times a week. His rides lately are taking way too long and carting him all around the city. Polak says when he asked why, the RTA implied he was essentially their captive. "They told me if they wanted to they could keep me on the Paratransit for up to 2.5 hours if they feel necessary.” Seriously, WTH?

Cleveland 19 News

4) "Super" Joe Charboneau, 67, is accused of kicking his wife in the rear-end and shoving her to the ground after an argument at Tony K's Bar & Grille in Berea last Friday, Aug. 12. The former Cleveland Indians outfielder and 1980 AL Rookie of the Year also threw beer at his wife and other bar goers. Police said he was "highly intoxicated" when they confronted him at his Olmsted Falls home later in the night and later became "erratic and aggressive" at the police station. He faces multiple charges.

3News WKYC

5) A man using the toilet at Mitchell's Ice Cream Shop on West 25th Street left with some boxes. Then he came back at 4 a.m. Wednesday and stole more boxes after breaking a window. An hour later, he returned to steal ice cream cakes and the employees' tip jar. Cleveland Police need your help identifying the Mitchell's thief.

Fox 8 News

5 More Stories You Need To See Today

• If you've ever had something stolen from you at the airport, you'll love this: Surveillance video helps catch baggage thieves at Cleveland Hopkins Airport (Cleveland 19 News)
• Looking to hire: Cleveland Clinic hosting career expo (Fox 8 News)
• Want expanded Amtrak service in Cleveland? Take this survey to help leaders lobby for the cause (Cleveland Scene)
• Richmond Heights police officers receive Bravery Award for their part in apprehending killer of Cleveland police officer Shane Bartek (Cleveland.com)
• This is how dangerous law enforcement jobs are in Ohio (24/7 Wall St. via Patch)

5 Things To Do

• Sommer Oktoberfest 2022, Donauschwaben's German-American Cultural Center, Olmsted Falls, Aug. 19-21 | Details
• Greek Food Festival, Cleveland Heights, Aug. 19-21 | Details
• Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets in Concert with the Cleveland Orchestra, Blossom Music Center, Aug. 20-21 | Details
• Tall Ships — US Brig Niagara and the Pride of Baltimore II — at Perry's Victory & International Peace Memorial, Put-in-Bay, to celebrate Commodore Perry's birthday, tours Aug. 20-21, noon to 5 p.m. | Details
• Cleveland Browns vs. Philadelphia Eagles, FirstEnergy Stadium, Aug. 20 | Details

Find more on our calendar | Add your event

Cleveland Chatter

• Browns visit Baker's new house in Week 1: "The latest Baker Mayfield news will have an IMPACT on the Cleveland Browns 👀" (Heavy on Browns via Facebook)
• City Dogs Cleveland: "Mamacita is the wiggle queen! This lady knows how to get comfortable and luxuriate anywhere. Mamacita is a hippo mama with oodles of delightful personality." (City Dogs Cleveland via Facebook)
• I feel the need for less speed: "The first speed table was installed as part of a pilot traffic calming initiative to slow traffic in neighborhoods across the city and stop speeding in common crash areas." (City of Cleveland - City Hall via Facebook)
• 👏👏👏👏 "Congratulations to CIA Alum Nikki Woods '12 on having her work featured on the cover of Canvas Magazine! 🧡 She currently serves as the Director of Reinberger Gallery." (Cleveland Institute of Art via Facebook)

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Events:

• Mindfulness Workshop "Finding Inspiration" - Walk & Talk with Avalon (August 19)
• Woodward Dream Show (August 19)
• Blonde Ambitions (August 19)
• Adoption 101: Where Do I Begin? (Virtual) (August 20)
• Saint Maron Annual Food Festival (August 20)
• Cleveland Water Lantern Festival (August 20)
• 42 South at Tony K's Bar & Grill! (August 20)
• Add your event

Now you're in the loop and ready to head out the door on this Friday! I'll see you soon.