I Can’t Leave You Anywhere

My daughter has had a rough run of neighbors watching her. Or, maybe it was rough on the neighbors. I am not quite sure yet. What I can tell you is that I am pretty cautious about leaving her with another neighbor on our street.

Let’s start in the neighbor’s defense.

She is a handful. And, that is putting it lightly. Alora is a self-appointment princess. She can be difficult, and I know it is not an easy task to watch small children.

They aren’t as perfectly behaved as we’d like to think.

The last few times my daughter has asked to go play at a friend’s home, she has come back in all kinds of trouble.

Try Number One: My daughter returned from her first play-date with her own, little self-applied, permanent make-up. How did she apply said product? Well, that would be a Sharpie marker.

If you’ve been there, perhaps you know the ever crucial lesson I had to learn at that moment: Ajax dish soap gets Sharpie marker right out. Just a little mom tip out there should you find yourself ever in need to remove marker from your child.

My child, of course, couldn’t just scribble on her hand, but no, thought that permanent eye shadow would be much nicer. In conjunction with her own rouge, lip stick, eyeliner and mascara, she had quite the professional procedure there.

A couple of scrubs with the Ajax later, we were clear.

Cut to Try Number Two: While playing with the same friend, same house, my daughter this time decided to take it up a notch. No more would permanent, skin-staining markers do the trick. But, instead, let’s try this bucket of slime.

Created for some in-house science experiment this bucket was in an office they weren’t to be even playing in, but that did not stop two 3-year-olds.

Diving right in, while my neighbor was washing dishes, the tiny duo decided the playroom (covered in toys already) would look so much better with a layer of splattered slime over it, too.

Two baths, loads of laundry, toy washing, floor scrubbing, wall washing … you get the idea. It was one HECK of a mess. I might have taken a photo had I not been so irate, as it was really something to see.

This time around, at a different friend’s house, she decided at 4 that she does not like the hair cut we’ve gotten her, so that she’d adjust and make one of her own. A few snips later and we are missing some strands from her mid-left locks.

I told her if she did that ever again, she might not be as pretty, and I think that ended that.

It is always an adventure with this kid.

I’m not sure if I should have growing excitement over her likely very creative and artistic future, or if I should just have another drink.

Here’s to parenting.