When It Comes To Parking, Territorialism Is A 2-Way Street [Block Talk]

Do people have the right to be territorial about or claim “ownership” of the street parking spaces directly in front of their houses?

It depends, readers said when we asked for Block Talk, Patch’s exclusive neighborhood etiquette column.

Mary, an Odenton-Severn (Maryland) Patch reader, thinks it’s not only OK, but her only recourse.

“One of our neighbors have six cars and they are constantly rude about parking on the street,” Mary said. “Even when civilly spoken to, they immediately lash out without provocation. They act entitled.”

That’s nothing.

“We have neighbors that have nine cars and not only take up the whole block of parking but leave their cars on the street overnight every night, even though there is a law against doing so,” said a Woodridge (Illinois) Patch reader.

“We haven’t done anything to this point,” the reader said, adding police haven’t issued any tickets for overnight parking violations. “You never know about retaliation.”

‘Had To Squish My Thoughts’

Those are extreme cases. Sometimes, there’s a good explanation for one family parking multiple cars on the public street, said San Juan-Capistrano Beach (California) Patch reader RJ, a primary health care provider on call 24/7.

“We do not have enough driveway space for all cars, and tandem parking doesn’t work if I am to leave in the middle of the night in a hurry,” RJ said.” We take up a street parking space for a teen child’s car.”

Neighbors have gaslighted RJ’s family in response, leaving nasty anonymous letters about nonexistent ordinances for street parking.

“This has created such stress and hostility in the neighborhood when we consider ourselves to be very kind and generous people who highly respect other people and property,” RJ said. “Now we feel the neighbors are obsessed with constantly finding something about us to complain about.

“We pray people can find things in their life more worthy of their time than obsessing over street parking!” RJ said.

Burlingame-Hillsborough (California) Patch reader Peg may know RJ’s neighbors. “I have a neighbor who obnoxiously confronts every car driver as they emerge from their car, even if it's going to be there for a few minutes,” she said.

“It’s a common issue in cities — people get way upset over it,” said Sarasota (Florida) Patch reader Egg. “You do not own the street in front of your house.”

Temecula (California) Patch reader Logix said on-street parking is fair game. “You beat them to it, or deal with it. Just like traffic, beat the traffic or deal with it,” the reader said.

Logix thinks entitlement is a distasteful pox on society.

“We should not allow society to groom us into complexities, like ‘entitlement,’ “ Logix said. “It’s making people miserable. Then it becomes a culture of anger and hate against each other, or neighbors, in this matter.”

Hopewell-Pennington (New Jersey) Patch reader Claudia agrees.

“But I have felt territorial and have had to squish my thoughts,” she said. “The only time I really get pissed is when the spot has had snow in it and my husband or I dug the spot out.”

“It is OK to be territorial if you are handicapped — or you shoveled a foot of snow,” said Naugatuck (Connecticut) Patch reader JoAnn.

“It usually doesn’t happen, but if a neighbor has a lot of visitors, what can you do?” she continued. “If it’s your neighbor with too many cars, all you can do is ask nicely for them to leave a space for you. Or it’s whoever gets there first.”

Know Neighbors, Know Their Needs

Pennsylvania Patch reader Mary is 88 and needs the parking space in front of her house when she gets groceries. When a neighbor parked there, she took care of it with a friendly holler across the street.

“I yelled to them to move their car when I arrived,” she said. “They haven’t parked there since. I only need one space, and now they leave my space open.”

Burbank (California) Patch reader Jim wishes he had such courteous neighbors. He is disabled and counts on an open spot in front of his home.

“If I have to park a block away, it’s extremely difficult to get to my house,” Jim said. “I wish people with bona fide handicaps could have one car length reserved in front of their houses.”

Jim said there’s nothing he can do. His neighbors have frequent parties and don’t remind their guests to show courtesy and leave the spot open.

‘Look Them Dead In The Eye’

New Lenox (Illinois) Patch reader Mary wants her children’s grandparents to be able to park steps away on the street when they babysit the kiddos.

Neighbors who don’t respect that get “the side eye,” Mary said.

“Look them dead in the eye when they are by their car in front of the house you are hoping to park at. Just stare at them. They will get the message,” she said.

“Sneer at them to see if they can understand it is a discourtesy,” said Concord (New Hampshire) Patch reader A.

Vienna (Virginia) Patch reader Mimi calls the police when she thinks there’s something suspicious about a car parked on residential streets.

“Some stolen cars end up parked on neighborhood streets even without auto tags and often without local inspection stickers,” Mimi said.

“It should be a given that the street in front of your home is for the homeowners’ vehicles,” said Lindenhurst (New York) Patch reader Michelle. “I had a neighbor who had a renter who insisted on parking in front of my house when they could have easily parked in front of the home they were renting from.

“I really appreciate neighbors who park in their garage or driveway,” said Rancho Santa Margarita (California) Patch reader Bob. “I think it’s sort of rude when neighbors don’t fully utilize or park in their garage or driveway and then park in front of someone else’s house.”

Bob doesn’t advise it, but said he understands how some people might become territorial when their neighbors park a strange or unknown car in front of their homes for days or weeks without letting them know.

“I think territorial isn’t the right word, but you do expect to be able to park one of your cars in front of your house occasionally,” said Long Island (New York) Patch reader Michelle. “If somebody parks in front of my house, I let it go, but if it’s the same person day and day out and they park taking up two spots, it’s really annoying.”

“If they idle for long periods of time, litter, work on cars, or make a ruckus, yes I would be very territorial,” said Mission Viejo (California) Patch reader Amanda.

She has a simple solution, though.

“We park in front of their house,” Amanda said. “That usually stops them from parking in front of our house.”

“It’s so rude of people to park in front of someone’s house for an extended period of time,” Coronado (California) Patch reader AA said. “For a get-together or something, it’s fine. Otherwise, it’s downright rude, especially when the car is trashy looking or leaks oil!”

‘Go Live In The Woods’

Jenn C., a Westbury (New York) Patch reader, said people who are bothered by parking in front of their house should “go live in the woods.”

“I have a home with enough parking spots for my entire family,” Jenn said. “However, my neighbor feels that the street belongs to him and on the occasion when we have guests that I’ve parked in front of his house, he feels he has the right to come and ring our doorbell and ask them to move.

“And my husband, wanting to keep the peace, asks the guests not to park in front of his home,” she said.

‘No One Brings Them Casseroles’

“People are absolutely nuts about the street parking in front of their house,” an Across America Patch reader said. “They don’t own it.”

True enough, Toms River (New Jersey) Patch reader Anme said, “but everyone in the neighborhood thinks it’s wrong for homeowners to always park in front of someone else’s house, especially if there is enough space if front of their own house.”

“We have one person in the neighborhood that does it on purpose,” Anme said. “He has enough space in front of his own house, but he will purposely park in front of his neighbor’s house. It’s not very neighborly.”

Apple Valley-Rosemount (Minnesota) Patch reader Judy knows all about that.

“My neighbor moved in and parked in front of my house every day, all day. He left trash, parked on my grass and blocked access to my house for my friends, family and contractors,” Judy said. “They all were forced to park a block away.”

After several months, Judy talked to the neighbor.

“He denied that he ever parked there,” Judy said. “I showed him the dead grass and tire tracks where he’d parked on my lawn.”

He stood nearby and watched as Judy reseeded the spot but said nothing.“Some people are just entitled @$$holes,” Judy wrote.

He is the kind of neighbor Annapolis (Maryland) Patch reader Laurie would say is “just a pill.”

“But maybe no one invites them to neighborhood parties or brings them casseroles when they’re sick,” she said.

As for the guy who killed Judy’s grass, “apologies go a long way,” Laurie said.

“Perhaps you have to temporarily park in one of the kids’ spots because you just sprained your ankle. Call and explain,” Laurie said. “And the kids’ parents should tell the kids to bring in your mail while you’re laid up. We all need to take care of each other.”

‘Just Like Road Rage’

Unwritten, unenforceable neighborhood codes “can get you into bigger trouble than you think, just like road rage,” said Mr. C., a Chicago Patch reader.

“A tax-paying citizen with taxed licensed plates, city sticker and all other associated taxes should be able to park on any public street without offending anyone. Conversely, how do you feel about that tree in front of your house, street side, that you want gone but you can’t do anything about? It is in front of your house, too,” he said.

“It’s life,” Mr. C. said. “Let’s learn to live with it.”

About Block Talk

Block Talk is an exclusive Patch series on neighborhood etiquette — and readers provide the answers. If you have a topic you'd like for us to consider, email beth.dalbey@patch.com with “Block Talk” as the subject line.

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