I=E/R in 13 couplets

... investigating Ohm's Law

While learning about an electrical circuit,

I became confused on just how to work it.

"Teach" drew on the board, a "real cool" schematic,

But it only grew worse as I stared and stared at it.

Transformer, coil, condenser or fuse!

I couldn't imagine which one to use.

And then in my mind, as I sat there yawning,

The answer arose like the sun in the morning.

Leave out the resistors; those parts are confusing

And then, by gosh, I'd know what he was using!

So I threw out each one, and connected each wire

And the value of "I" grew higher and higher.

And then the fuse melted right out of the socket.

So I slipped in a penny I had in my pocket.

The paint on the trainer was melting like tar,

But the circuit was growing much simpler by far.

And then as I connected the very last wire

Somebody yelled, "Look out for the fire!"

And just as he said it, there was a bright flash;

Followed at once by a very loud crash!

The last I remember was smoke filling the room

And I thought to myself, "This looks like my doom!"

But my life was spared, and for this I thank God.

But I woke up next week in a hospital ward.

So the moral of this most unusual instance

Is, "When fooling with circuits, don't leave out resistance."

Steve Johnson

Lowery Air Force Base, Technical Training School

1956.

Previously published

June 4, 2004